And to all a Good Night

So, after all the hype of the media, has your Christmas come & gone? Ours hasn't. Not only is our "gift" lasting a whole week, but we also have the peace that comes from our entire family being in relationship with Jesus & knowing that one day we will be reunited with him in heaven.


Yesterday morning we celebrated Teag's first Christmas with her. She wasn't in to the presents at all~we grown-ups took turns opening them...although these pictures make it look as though only her mama opened presents with her, we really did take turns!

While she was not into opening presents, she was very into what came out of the gift wrapping~except for the shoes we got her...we have learned that Teag does not like shoes!!!

What a sad face!!!!!!

She sat down & cried til we took those horrible-but adorable-shoes off her feet!

But the toys~those she liked! Noah & his animal friends were baptized in water very quickly...

....the drooly slimey kind of water!

While it's still a bit big for her, my favorite gift that she received was a rocking horse! It even makes sounds like a galloping, whinneying horse! I think Teag liked it...she definitely liked that this animal didn't run from her grabbing like our cats do!

Ride 'em Cowgirl!

~~~~~~~~~~~

The best gift came later in the afternoon: my brother & sister-in-law arrived to spend the week with us! Their original Christmas plans~as with most of their life~changed 6 weeks ago, and we were able to have them come up to be with us.

We are so blessed to have them here with us but it is bittersweet as we wish so much that Demetri was here with us, too. But we hold on to the hope that we will be reunited with him in heaven one day...until then we hold on to one another & value each other and life in a new way...

Later in the evening some of the Huffman crew stopped by for a little bit...it was fun & noisy & yummy (Grandma Sue brought homemade fudge!)

Looks like we need a bigger living room!!!

Overall, we had a beautiful & blessed Christmas day & evening...and then we all collapsed into bed for some much needed sleep!

Merry Christmas

Pretty as a Flower

One Month...30 Days...

...a life time...

...be prepared: these will truly be mixed up musings...much of my thinking is these days.

I found a website that is for child-loss that also had wonderful things for grandparents...I only wish I could find something for grieving aunts...there's nothing out there (that I've been able to find so far) for me...and we (J&D's sisters) are heartbroken too~not just for Demetri but for J&D too.

I have had nightmares that Teag dies too. Honestly, I couldn't go on if that happened, but I know it's just that fear of more loss raising it's ugly head. On the other hand, thank God for Teag & the sweet joy she brings.

And yet with her 1st steps & beginning to really talk, her wonder over the glittering mystery that is Christmas in all its wrappings, there's that bittersweet sharp intake of breath with the thought that Demetri will never be doing this. He will never shake with joy when I walk in the door like she does; he will never want to try to walk into my arms. We will never cuddle up together & read the books I've bought for him. He will never fullfil all the dreams we had for him & it sucks.

But I would not trade knowing him~even if ever so briefly~in order to take away the pain. I'd rather endure the pain, the heartache, the dull throb that is always lurking around the corner during those "normal" moments...than to have never known him at all.

I love you, Demetri. I will never forget you...I will always speak your name with love. You will never cease to exist even while you are not here with us physically.

Watch Out World!

Make sure your volume is up for this one......

There's no stopping her now!!!

The Wonder of It All

Ah.....to have that innocent, child-like wonder again.

Walk With Me

Come, walk with me, my friend,
I'll hold your hand.
This journey is not one to understand.
There is no sorting out
Chaff from the wheat.
We have to take the bitter with the sweet.

Come, walk with me,
Along the trail of tears.
We'll share our heartbreak, and our hopes and fears.
This trail is not designed
To walk alone.
But we will make discoveries of our own.

Come, walk with me, my friend,
We'll share the load
Up every hill and down the rugged road.
No map to show the route
Or tell how far.
No compass points the way, or guiding star.

Come, walk with me,
And I will walk with you.
Perhaps we two will find a better view.
Perhaps the trail,
Though thorny on the feet,
Wll widen for two sorrowed hearts to meet.

Come, walk with me
Through brambled vine and thorn.
Step over stones that leave hearts ripped and torn.
The walk is never easy,
That is true.
But you will walk with me, and I with you.

~Gwen Flowers